Trusting Your GUT when your child is ill

What happens when your child is ill?

Have you ever thought you were going crazy when it came to your kids? Sure, we all get stressed out by the demands parenting requires of us whether they be mundane, daily happenings (“No you can’t have another cookie!”, “Stop teasing your brother!”) or extreme, unlikely circumstances (Hello pandemic-looking at you!)

But, what if there was something wrong with your child, (who also happens to have neurodevelopmental delays or another neurodivergent diagnosis)  and no experts had any answers for you? What if you took your kiddo to all the “BEST” doctors out there and they either had no answers, their diagnosis conflicted with one another, or worst of all, they just didn’t believe your child had a problem?

Mom gives daughter medicine

Misdiagnosis happens.

I am here to tell you that it happens.  And when it is your child who is struggling and suffering, it is exquisitely painful. You feel like you are living in a nightmare that you simply cannot wake from and that somehow, those around you are seeing a distorted view of reality.  A 2019 article* states that, “the mindset that young children are rarely seriously ill is one of the main reasons that they are more likely to be misdiagnosed than adults are. That’s on top of all of the ways that approximately 10 percent of American adults are misdiagnosed every year. When doctors and nurses expect to see a healthy child with a common short-lived illness, they may miss the uncommon ones.”  

The article goes on to list the main reasons for children receiving a diagnosis that’s wrong or delayed:

  1. Attitude: Since most children are healthy, and most illnesses resolve on their own, doctors may tend to reassure parents rather than accept concerns are real
  2. Biology: Young children’s bodies and systems are radically different than adults, so they present and respond in unexpected ways
  3. Unequipped: Most children’s emergency room visits are to community or adult hospitals that often don’t have needed kid-sized equipment or pediatric experts. Urgent care centers have similar issues.
  4. Communication: Young children don’t understand or know what is wrong so they’re dependent on parents or caregivers to recognize and then interpret their symptoms

Experts may give you the brush off.

However, there are cases where a parent’s concerns are dismissed, as I was when my daughter presented with a long, puzzling, seemingly unrelated laundry list of symptoms that spanned years, nearly a decade by the time a diagnosis was finally rendered.  During that time period, I was given advice from some well-meaning individuals who said things like:

  • “Just accept her as she is and stop looking for answers that aren’t there.”
  • “Doctors are the experts and you have to trust them when they tell you something, even when treatments don’t work or something seems to be missing in their answer.”
  • “You want her to be sick so that you get attention or sympathy”
lab test machine

Did any of this help my daughter get better or me find answers? That would be a resounding no.  Oh, and by the way, that last piece of “advice” above was given to me, in front of my child, by a supposedly well-respected doctor. He dismissed all the hundreds of pages of tests, scans, medical records and prior diagnosis, didn’t help my daughter, and charged for it!

So what DO YOU DO?  You don’t give up- you trust your gut! Parents know their children best and what their “normal” looks like, even if it doesn’t match the textbook image. Remember to believe in yourself and your ability to help your child. Make a bulleted list of every symptom, even if it does not seem totally related, and the date the symptom started. Research the heck out of your child’s symptoms and any test results you have, using the best and most trusted resources you can find.  Become well acquainted with clinical research papers, societies for various branches of disease types ( think brain, stomach, nervous system, etc.)  Join an online group for other parents who may be seeking answers for their child or who may have information to share.

The Society to Improve Diagnosis in Medicine says not to get overwhelmed by the risks of misdiagnosis. Rather, recognize there are a few key things to do, to assist in getting an accurate and (hopefully) prompt diagnosis. These tips also help if your child is in the middle of a diagnostic journey today.

  1. Sign up for the doctors’ or hospitals’ patient portal and check the records thoroughly. “Is the information correct? Are the medications and medical history correct? Read it, correct it, and tell the doctor” or the staff.
  2. Important test results can slip through the cracks and that may lead to misdiagnosis and lack of treatment. Keep track of any tests that are done on your child. That includes blood tests, urine tests, x-rays, and any other type of scan. If your child has a test, simply ask when the results are expected and note it in your calendar. If you don’t get called or emailed with results, call and ask about them. Remember, “No News is No News.” Don’t accept being told, “We will call you if there’s a problem.”
  3. Trust your gut. You’re the people who know and care about your child the most. All of the experts encourage parents to speak up if they feel their child’s symptoms aren’t getting enough attention or if there’s any confusion between what the family is saying and the medical professional is hearing.
  4. If your child isn’t showing signs of improvement, get a second opinion. Ask friends and family members in town for a recommendation of a pediatrician in a different practice, or ask your current pediatrician for a specialist to give a second opinion.
  5. Be prepared before you bring your child to the doctor or an emergency room. While your child is healthy, check if there’s a pediatric urgent care or emergency room close to where you live. If you have a planned appointment, there is a valuable tool you can start using today. The SIDM Patient Toolkit is a handy step-by-step workbook with sections to fill out before, during and after your doctor’s appointment.
  6. If you’re using the internet to look for more information, be sure to use reliable and trusted sources. The American Academy of Pediatrics’ (AAP) Healthy Children section is a great place to begin. 

In closing, you, as a parent, are the most trusted authority on your child.  If you feel that something is wrong with your child and it is not getting resolved, don’t be afraid to speak up.  Your child and your family deserve answers and the best possible care.  Be brave and know that what your GUT is telling you, may be right. (If you have a question for Melanie (author/Kid PT Marketing) email her at info@kidpt.com)

*References

https://www.improvediagnosis.org/dxiq-column/why-your-child-is-more-likely-to-be-misdiagnosed-than-you-are/

Participation in the arts are a way for someone to express themselves. It creates a window into the soul and an escape all in one. Some turn to painting, drawing, music, drama, or dancing to find their sense of self or to relieve stress after a long day, and this is no different for kids and adults with Cerebral Palsy (CP). Taking part in the arts is a wonderful thing for children with CP to do, no matter their level of disability, and here’s why!


Self Expression Without Limits

The arts allow for a place to explore what you are thinking or feeling. Whether you are verbal or non-verbal, participation in an art form is a way to get your feelings out! Society often tries to put us in boxes that may make us feel limited. But when you are creating art, you get to make the rules. Bend the rules to work for you

Adaptability

With the free form nature of many arts programs there are no rules that have to be adjusted to make it work for your body. If your dancing includes, moving your head side to side to make your wheelchair turn to the right and the left, do it! If you need something to secure a paint brush to one of your hands or to your head to paint your beautiful picture, why not! It’s your masterpiece, so the environment can be set up to make creating your art that much easier.

Community OR Solitary Art

Many arts are performed in a group setting for those who love being social, like Drama. You can find your Drama, Dance, or Visual Arts community if that floats your boat. BUT the cool thing about the arts is many forms don’t have to be done in a group, they can be done alone too if you’d prefer to work that way.

Confidence Booster

For many kids and adults, taking part in the creation of something beautiful, or something they made themselves, is a huge confidence booster. When the right adaptations are in place to support each child or adult, either with motor or intellectual considerations, the child can make something by themselves (or with a little bit of teamwork if needed) and feel proud of themselves for doing so!

Types of Art

Visual Arts

  • Visual arts include painting, drawing, sculpture and photography, are likely to be the most common of all arts programs designed for people with disabilities.
  • The visual arts are easily modified. A child’s pointer finger, pencils, and brushes can all be adapted to fit their needs by instructors or parents. The most common forms of modifications are handles and grips on paint brushes, pencils and pens; easels that can be attached to a wheelchair or placed on a table. There are even attachments designed for the head in which the artist can manipulate the brush, just as is used on a pointer for the computer.
  • Photography can also be modified to meet various physical needs. Cameras can be attached to wheelchairs so they can remain stable while a person is shooting a photo. It might require some creative thinking, but if the photographer cannot use their fingers, cameras can be placed in such a way that a student can use their tongue to release the shutter.

Dance

  • When many people think of dance, they picture the ballerina trope, but that’s not all dance is, in fact, there are so many styles of dance! This includes modern, ballet, tap, and jazz. In the past years, dance has become so much more freeform than people think. With the dawn of modern dance and creative movement, movement can be whatever you want! The creation of movement is often left up to the dancer OR to the choreographer
  • Movement can be created in many ways. Students in wheelchairs can be pushed by a fellow dancer while they dance in their chair or other times can push themselves in a pattern as part of the choreography. Students can use their crutches or walkers to move, participate in floor mobility, and show off their specific mobility strengths. Choreographers can play into this as well, creating routines that maximize each dancer’s strengths.
  • As Dance is very aerobic, it also provides an outlet to work on mobility, strength, and develop flexibility. It can help those moving to stay fit and healthy. It can also help children with CP work on coordination and balance!

Drama

  • Theater programs for disabled actors provide opportunities to show off their talent. Often, modifications are made to shows that make the performance accessible to actors with disabilities. There are troupes of performers with disabilities as well as productions who participate in inclusive casting. 
  • Theater is often all about building community and putting yourself out there, and for many regardless of mobility status, gives actors the chance to put on a second skin. When you are acting as another person, you get to leave your own troubles behind and step into that person’s life and mind for a few hours. This can be a great escape for anyone, including children and adults with a disability.

Music

  • Music is another way that children and adults with CP can creatively express themselves and can be a great stress reliever. Music, like the other artistic forms discussed above, can be followed, but it can also be created! A child with CP can participate in a piece of music though percussive instruments, can learn to strum the strings of a guitar, and others too. 
  • Music therapy is a great outlet to explore as it not only allows for creative expression but also works on rhythm and timing, social skills, language, and mobility!

But where is there to go in NJ for my child with CP to participate in the arts? Check out these links to find out more!

Dance:

http://kayelynndance.com/chance-to-dance/

http://www.danceinnovations.org/dipf

http://kayelynndance.com/chance-to-dance/

http://www.danceinnovations.org/dipf

Theater:

https://papermill.org/access-for-all

Art: 

https://www.tasoc.org/

Music:

https://www.theconnectiononline.org/com

https://jamminjenn.com

References:

https://www.cerebralpalsy.org/information/activities/arts

https://www.cerebral-palsy-faq.org/art-exhibit-highlights-skills-of-children-with-cerebral-palsy.html#:~:text=Art%20therapy%20stimulates%20expression%20and,intelligibility%20due%20to%20cerebral%20palsy.